So this happened:
Yep. Tore the MCL in my left knee while moving a chair. (I've got to come up with a better story for that. Tore my MCL while kickboxing Chuck Norris? Tore my MCL while two-stepping with my movie star boyfriend Ted Levine at the Broken Spoke? Tore my MCL while jumping out of a helicopter, over a waterfall, to bring much-needed medicine to ... orphaned river otters? Yeah. Let's go with that. I'll send the otters a check; it'll be fine.)
I don't know how badly it's torn because I haven't followed up yet with an orthopedist AS INSTRUCTED but Doctor Google says the treatment is more or less the same, it just takes longer if it's a really bad one which I don't think it is, so whatever. All I know is that it is VERY VERY HARD to dress around a knee immobilizer that goes from your crotch to your ankle. I don't mean dressing UP, to look NICE -- I'm old so who cares -- I mean actually wearing clothing items that prevent me from flashing my granny panties at the world. IT'S HARD, Y'ALL. TINY VIOLINS.
I was supposed to wear this ferkakta thing through tomorrow but screw that, I graduated myself to a fairly sturdy drugstore knee brace as of yesterday and it feels totally fine. I still can't wear jeans over even this little brace, though. I miss my jeans, you guys. TINY CELLO.
It could be worse, I suppose. Six years ago this month, this happened:
I sprained the shit out of (I believe that was the official diagnosis) my right ankle (no followup again, DOCTOR GOOGLE IS MY PCP, quit judging) in October 2008 and that took a REALLY long time to heal and also I had to use CRUTCHES which meant I was catapulting myself all over the place because I am super bad at crutches and I COULDN'T DRIVE. For like a month. OMG. That sucked so hard. THE WORLD'S SMALLEST TUBA.
This time I can drive. It requires some whack-ass origami contortionism to make it happen, or it did before I ditched the immobilizer, but IT IS/WAS POSSIBLE. And thank God for that, because you wouldn't like me when I'm forcibly housebound. It ain't pretty.
Anyhoo, the point is that every six years or so, October tries to kill me. Good to know. If I plan ahead now, maybe I can spend October 2020 in a nice medically induced coma or something, just to be safe.
Meanwhile, right now I am ...
... reading Tana French's Broken Harbor. This is the fourth book in her Dublin Murder Squad series, the one that began with In The Woods, and I dunno, you guys. I love everything she does but this might be my least-favorite book in the series so far. It's still GOOD, it's just ... not In The Woods. Or The Likeness. Or Faithful Place.
... watching Live Free Or Die, and I am probably the only one, but I kind of love this show! It's about several different people who for whatever reason choose to live off the grid and off the land. Not in a weird Doomsday Preppers kind of way (I don't actually watch that show so I may not know what I'm talking about) but just because, you know, they like it.
... listening to Diane Sanfilippo's Build a Badass Business podcast. Because I guess that's what I'll be doing as a health coach. Diane is super rad and her tips are so amazing and they seem DOABLE, which is key.
... eating all the things. I don't know why, but this injury made me super hungry. I'm big on sweet potato noodles (made with one of these contraptions) right now. And kale! Which I used to not even like it, but now I love it, because I've become one of those annoying people! I've mostly been making chips with it, because CHIPS, but later this afternoon I'll be whipping up a kale salad with bacon and honeycrisp apples and pomegranate arils and probably pumpkin seeds and who knows what else. GOD I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
... drinking mineral water (this one specifically). I don't know why. I originally bought it to make fake martinis (mineral water, a drop of vermouth, a couple of olives -- it's vile, don't try it) but then I just started drinking it and now I like it and I don't know.
And that about brings you up to speed. I hope your month is going well and that October isn't trying to kill you. Because if it is, maybe we can form a support group.
Friday, October 17, 2014
Thursday, October 9, 2014
I'm joining in with Heather again this week, and cheating a bit by dipping way back into September for some kitchen photos. Because I only did the one post in September, don'tcha know.
That top photo was my birthday cake this year. It's the Chocolate Zucchini Cake with Vanilla Spiced Cream from Paleo Sweets and Treats. Gorgeous, and the cake was delicious but I wasn't super crazy about the cashew cream. Maybe if I'd used fresher cashews (I store raw nuts in the freezer and some of them have been in there a while, ahem). I think next time I'll try a whipped coconut cream or meringue topping instead.
The cupcakes were Danielle Walker's Snickerdoodle Cupcakes with Italian Meringue Frosting from her first cookbook, Against All Grain, and they were absolute perfection. Delicious cake, delicious (and easy!) honey-sweetened meringue that I can't wait to make again. These were for my parents' 50th wedding anniversary celebration, which was awesome!
I'm still soaking nuts weekly for homemade nut milk (I also use the recipe in Against All Grain for that!) and I'm so happy that it's kale chip season again! I suppose you can do other things with kale, put it in soups and make salads with it and whatnot, but I don't know why you would when there are KALE CHIPS. I'm a little bit addicted.
Also really happy that okra is in season, though I guess it's probably on its way out in most parts of the country by now. We can still get it here, though, and I love it so much -- roasted, grilled, sauteed with bacon, it's all good!
And pears! I seriously can't stop eating them now that organic varieties are showing up in my local store. I always forget how good they are and their season seems so short.
And finally, I am drinking herbal teas by the truckload lately. Because guess what else is in season right now where I live? RAGWEED. My nemesis. I don't have photos of the bone broth I made yesterday or the lemon-ginger-cayenne kombucha I bought at Natural Grocer or the other 4,718 varieties of medicinal teas I have in the pantry, but I am determined to kick ragweed's ass this year. BEGONE, FOUL PESTILENCE. And take the Fall Elm pollen with you! (Also the mold. And the mosquitoes. Enough with both of those, seriously.)
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
What the heck, how have I not posted at all this month? I don't know what to tell you. Things are sort of busy. H is back at school (she had strep the first week, did I tell you? that was fun) and C is doing some sort of cyber security certification course (I think we finally have a Plan there) and my health coaching classes have started and my birthday is this week and my parents' 50th wedding anniversary is next week and yeah. Busy!
I have been trying really hard to not be so busy, you guys. I realized that a lot of my busy-ness was self-generated hoohah that didn't need to happen, and as a result I have stopped following a bunch of people on Twitter and Tumblr and Instagram and unsubbed a bunch of email newsletters and rejiggered my newsfeed on Facebook such that I now spend WAY less time online and way less time worried that I'm missing something, except that I'm totally missing lots of somethings. But I've decided not to care. I've also stopped watching TV shows that make me feel unclean, so adiós, Sons of Anarchy. You were good back when you were all Hamlet-y but now you just make me feel like I need to take a shower and go to confession. And I'm not even Catholic! Something's gotta give.
I'm reading Kate Atkinson's Life After Life and boy is it good. I thought it was going to be some weird Lovely Bones thing, you know, like it would take place at least partially in the AFTERLIFE. But no, the title refers to multiple lives in succession, not the afterlife. Or multiple iterations, in succession, of the same life. I dunno. You'd have to read it. It's really good. After that I'm tackling Louise Penny's The Beautiful Mystery because the TENTH Chief Inspector Gamache book just came out and I'm still two books behind, quelle horreur! And then I'll probably read some more Pema Chödrön.
I get the itch to change things in September. Maybe because of my birthday, or the changing seasons, or the start of school or whatever. September is when I want to clean out closets and throw things away and do the whole "in with the new" thing. So far all I've done is start wearing jeans instead of shorts (I don't CARE if I die of heat stroke, I really don't, I'm done with shorts for this year) and start drinking hot coffee and tea instead of iced coffee and tea. But whatever. It all counts. Plus: pumpkin spice lattes! YES.
Tuesday, August 26, 2014
I'm trying a new thing, y'all. It's called mindfulness meditation and it's going great except for the part where I keep thinking about mindfulness meditation -- you know, just in general, and about how great it is and whatever -- when I'm supposed to be BEING MINDFUL, oh the irony. Like I will be washing dishes, which Thich Nhat Hanh says you're supposed to do mindfully, as in you are giving your full attention to the dishes you're washing and living in the moment and not thinking about what you need to do after that or how your meeting tomorrow is going to go or any of that stuff, and instead I'm thinking, "Hey! I'm washing the dishes! I should do this MINDFULLY because mindfulness is awesome. Yep. Mindfulness! I sure do love me some of that. How do people not know about this mindfulness thing?!" And then I break a glass because I wasn't paying attention to what I was doing.
I kid you not, I was ruminating on mindfulness today and while doing so I accidentally took a second dose of probiotics because I WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION TO WHAT I WAS DOING, aka BEING MINDFUL. I know. I obviously have a lot of work to do here, people.
Anyhoo, it's the first day of school and H is a freshly minted high school junior and I'm sitting by the phone today because she is feeling poorly, argh. We're thinking/hoping she's just hella allergic and not actually sick, but boy howdy, how much does that suck for my poor girl, feeling like crap on the first day of school? I hope she makes it through the day okay. Only two hours to go.
Speaking of school, I am officially enrolled in health coaching/nutrition school! YES! I am so freaking excited. Classes start on September 15th and I get certified on September 8th of next year. This is something I have wanted for months and months and monthsandmonthsandmonths. I had a momentary freakout over studying and tests and whatnot, seeing as I haven't done any of that for *cough* 26 years *cough*, but I got over that pretty quickly and now I am almost literally vibrating with excitement. Can. Not. WAIT. For classes to start.
Otherwise we're just trying to survive the heat ovah heah. I have been reading stuff: The Giver, because it's H's favorite book and I'd never read it; Tana French's Faithful Place, the third book in her Dublin Murder Squad series which is FABULOUS; a bunch of mindfulness meditation stuff -- Thich Nhat Hanh and Pema Chodron and Jon Kabat-Zinn -- and I'm pretty sure Kate Atkinson's Life After Life is up next, fiction-wise.
And watching stuff: The Strain has grown on me and now I'm all in, Rectify had a good second season, The Bridge is pretty awesome as well, and I think I like The Knick, maybe? Falling Skies is still SUPER STUPID and I probably won't watch next season. Cannot WAIT for the final season of Sons of Anarchy, the new season of American Horror Story, and for The Walking Dead to start back up. Oh, and Doctor Who! LOVE LOVE LOVE Peter Capaldi as The Doctor. LOVE. Nine was always "my" Doctor but I think Twelve might be my new favorite. As long as they don't write him too silly.
In other news, P and I saw Guardians of the Galaxy the other night and it was great fun, and I have a new favorite non-alcoholic beer: Buckler! Yeah. They serve it at the Alamo and it's pretty good, y'all. I like it even better than Clausthaler.
Maybe I should drink like ten of them and try to meditate again? I downloaded a timer app for my phone and everything! Now I just need an app that turns off my brain. Oy.
Monday, August 11, 2014
August is flying by, you guys. One of my favorite things about summer, which is brutal here in central Texas, is that we finally get direct sunlight through our north-facing back windows in the mornings and evenings. I swear within the past five days or so we've gone from giant, soul-restoring swaths of brilliant sun to two skinny, faded columns of watery light on the wall behind our bed. Those seasons just keep on changing, eh?
I'm trying to hang on to the last days of summer by eating my bodyweight in fresh seafood and drinking gallons of fruity mocktails and ... mostly staying indoors, truth be told. Wake me when it's no longer 80 degrees at 7:30 a.m., won't you?
I went to my 30-year high school reunion this weekend and it was SO FUN. I drank nothing but water all night and still had a wicked hangover the next morning -- THAT'S how fun it was. (That was totally from the fun and not from being almost 50 years old and staying out way past my bedtime. Yes it was. Shut up.)
- I was charmed by the number of my former classmates who had married their high school sweethearts while simultaneously feeling SO VERY relieved that I did not do that. Given that my high-school sweethearts consisted of a(n alleged) drug dealer, a(n eventual) stalker and a (I did not know this at the time, I swear) married man ... yeah. Dodged a whole clip full there, didn't I?
- Also very relieved that I had the foresight in high school not to date anyone from my graduating class. Way to go, me. That would have made the whole reunion thing a lot more awkward.
- All the women looked exactly the same as they did in high school, except for the ones who looked even better. I wonder if science ever will explain that.
- It's amazing what can change in 10 years, as I'm fairly certain that at our 20-year reunion in 2004 there was no Facebook and texting was not a thing. Or at least, these things did not exist FOR ME. But now they do, which makes it SO MUCH EASIER to keep in touch with old friends. Which is very cool. And I feel old for even talking about this.
- This was the first of our three-so-far reunions that I attended 100% sober and the one at which I had the most fun. That sounds like such a recovering alcoholic thing to say, and I don't even consider myself to be a recovering alcoholic, but there you go.
Anyhoo, YES. I am very glad I went. I did end up wearing a dress and flip-flops, just for the record. And I'm not sorry.
Now that the last summery thing on my calendar has come and gone, it's back to the usual August pre-schoolyear craziness. H's supplies and clothes are bought. She has cut and dyed her hair. I've entered all the school holidays into our family calendar. I'll be enrolling in an online nutrition institute for health coaching certification within the week, Deo volente. If a food can't be grilled, cooked in the crock pot or made into a cold salad, we're not having it for dinner. And my Kindle is all loaded up with meaty tomes to get me through autumn and the beginning of winter.
Let's do this, you guys.
Wednesday, July 23, 2014
H and I spent two glorious days in Corpus Christi last week and all I have to show for it are sunburned feet. And a big bag of shells. And a shirt; I did get a pretty awesome shirt while we were there. And a bit of a tan on the parts that aren't sunburned. But THAT'S ALL I HAVE NOW.
It was a very fun trip. H and I travel well together. We should do it again, like, next week. And every week thereafter. Yep.
But no, we can't, because it's almost time for back-to-school and I am really busy watching television, you guys. Rectify is back on and I love it but I'm kind of hoping Amantha gets killed off sometime real soon now because she's ALMOST ruining the show for me, I hates her so much. The Bridge is back too and I love that one and everything about it is perfect and my GIANT crush on Ted Levine continues unabated. (I. Love. Him. SOMUCH.) Falling Skies is back but it's terrible now (except for Pope -- I heart Pope), so boo. Face Off is back too but I haven't watched last night's season premier yet, so shhh on that for now. The Strain is stupid but I can't stop watching it, and I'd like to take this opportunity to implore Hollywood to stop putting terrible wigs on hot bald guys, because some of us like them JUST FINE the way they are, thankyouverymuch. And finally, Drunk History is rocking my world right now. Up, down and all around. LOVE it!
And also I've been reading stuff! I know! Look at me, with the culture and shit! I can't remember what I was reading when last we spoke about reading but I'm still loving Karin Fossum's Inspector Sejer books and Kate Atkinson's Jackson Brodie books. I read The Silkworm, the second Cormoran Strike book by Robert Galbraith, who as you probably know is actually J.K. Rowling, and I loved it so much that I didn't want it to end. I bought a paperback copy of Tom Rachman's The Imperfectionists to read at the beach, and I didn't read ANY of it at the actual beach, but now that I've finished it my feelings are mixed. I liked it while I was reading it, but ultimately it was pretty depressing. Now I'm re-reading The Last Policeman by Ben H. Winters, which is SUPER fantastic and highly recommended, because the third book in that series is just out and I hadn't even read the second one yet. So many books, y'all. So little time.
Aside from all the back-to-school stuff with H, my 30-year high school reunion is the next thing up for which I must gear. The tricksy organizers have totally thrown me off by declaring the event casual dress, like what does that even mean? What is casual?! WHAT ARE WORDS FOR WHEN NO ONE LISTENS ANYMORE??!! In Austin, "casual" could mean anything from that bikini up there to "you can totally wear cowboy boots and a bolo with that tux, bro," so I am stymied. Except I'm pretty sure I'm not wearing that bikini. Maybe a DIFFERENT bikini? Maybe a cocktail dress with flip-flops? Is that casual? Bermuda shorts with a ripped concert tee and heels? Cutoffs and pearls? Are the pearls too much? WHY IS THIS SO HARD?
Anyway, yeah. That's what's going on around here. And how has YOUR summer (or winter) been?
Thursday, July 10, 2014
Playing along with Heather again this week...
You guys! I know, it's been two weeks. And it's just food again. This might be all you get out of me for a while. Apparently 6-12 months ago I decided to make ALL THE APPOINTMENTS for June and July, so the kids and I have been running back and forth to doctor and dentist and optometrist visits in what is beginning to feel like a Groundhog Day type of scenario. There have been plenty of doings in the kitchen, though.
- Burgers are happening. I eat mine without buns, which is probably good considering how many other toppings I manage to pile on/around them.
- I am trying really hard to perfect dairy-free tzatziki. REALLY REALLY HARD. Almost there. I'll probably post the recipe to the other blog once I've perfected it.
- Muffins! It's this recipe from PaleOMG. They're cooling on my counter as we speak and my house smells AMAZING.
- We had ribs and coleslaw for the 4th. That's it -- just ribs and coleslaw. That's all the food groups, right? Yeah.
- I'm still making ice cream. I felt you should know. (This is the Salted Caramel Chocolate Chunk ice cream from Kelly Brozyna's Dairy-Free Ice Cream and it's ridiculously amazing.)
- Sometimes leftovers-for-lunch means cold grilled shrimp, kimchi and half an avocado. And that's okay.
- I am sooooo loving the direct sunlight that comes into our north-facing back windows in the evenings. It only happens in the summer and it's pretty much my favorite thing. My next house needs WAY more direct sunlight. This one is kind of a tomb most of the year.