Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Dogs are the worst
Well, we had a bit of excitement today courtesy of El Guapo here. He had a grooming appointment this morning (we have a mobile groomer who comes to the house and grooms him in a snazzy dog-spa trailer hooked to her pickup and WE LOVE HER) and apparently one of his toenails was clipped a little close and the rain (it rained! a bunch! finally!) and his general hyperness (do not EVEN get me started) combined to melt/dislodge the styptic powder she put in there and suddenly when she brought him back inside there was BLOOD EVERYWHERE. All over my house! Well, not the whole house, but the entire FRONT of the house looked a bit like we'd slaughtered a goat.
The groomer was horrified (totally not her fault; he has solid black toenails and a loooong quick) and ran back out to her grooming trailer for more styptic powder, which stopped it tout de suite. She offered to help me clean up all the blood but I was like, "Um, there is not enough tip money IN THE WORLD to compensate you for that," so I shooed her out the door. And then I had to wrestle the dog into his crate so I could clean up the floor, all while shrieking at him, "OMG, STOP LICKING THE STYPTIC POWDER OUT OF YOUR TOENAIL, you jerk! It already looks like Dexter's kill room up in here! STOP IT."
But anyhoo, the dog is fine. And I cleaned up all the blood. This story has a very anti-climactic ending, sorry. In happier news, we are halfway through NaBloPoMo so you only have 15 more days of inane crap like this! Yay!